Sunday, 26 February 2017

It's okay to have a freak out

 A couple of weeks ago whilst at work, I suddenly decided that I wanted to go back to uni and do a masters in September, and was adamant that I wanted to do this. When I woke up a day later, I realised that I did not want to go back to uni and do a masters, and that actually I had been having a freak out about the future. (I did the very same around this time last year).
 I think it's hard to transition into 'literally anything could happen in the future' after going through the education system for around 17 years of my life, where you knew that come the end of the academic year, you would simply be moving on to the next. This was not a guarantee when moving from GCSE's to A-Levels, and even less so when applying for universities and having to wait until the middle of August to know if you had 'got the grades' to get into the university of choice. Luckily, I managed to get into my first choice, but I remember the Christmas before being gifted lots of things for university which led me to having a meltdown in the evening. The uncertainty surrounding university, for me anyway, was more 'where will I be going' rather than 'will I be going'.
 After graduating that whole sense of security falls away into 'I need a job'. My previous role was temporary and fitted in really well as I knew that I wanted to apply for a graduate internship position at the university (and hooray that's what I'm currently doing!) but again this is only for a temporary period. Soon again that uncertainty will present itself, and after having a freak out about it, actually I've come to realise that it's okay.  To freak out is okay. It's okay to be scared of the future but also to accept the uncertainty that it brings, and view it in a positive light. After freaking out about it, I've decided to 'roll with it'. Rolling with it has got me this far and I'm pretty happy with how things are going, so although it's scary, I'm looking forward to seeing what the future brings.

Jess x


1 comment

  1. What will be will be, and you are right, Worrying about it won't change things. Sometimes it helps just thinking about a day at a time ❤️❤️❤️❤️


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